What's going down?
Puck contemplates what he has learnt from life so far. 1. Never punch a cop in the face. 2. You can't choose love, love chooses you. The latest object of his affections is Lauren. In order for her to join Glee, he gave her 'seven minutes in heaven' and has been hooked even since. Unfortunately for him, Lauren's conclusion afterwards was that he wasn't very good and was "kinda scrawny". It's almost Valentine's Day and he's determined to win her over. It's not looking like it's going to be easy, though, due to the barrage of insults she sends his way.
Since the football team won the Conference Championship, Finn is once again Mr Popularity and
he sure is happy about it, especially since all the ladies now want him. Who will he choose to be his
valentine? Well, he already has his heart set on winning Quinn again, "Maybe the reason it didn't
work out with Rachel was because I was never over Quinn," he contemplates. He decides that he'll
be able to steal her from Sam if only he can get her to kiss him again.
Whilst Kurt is being all cynical about Valentine's Day, Blaine admits that it's his favourite holiday and that he's just a "hopeless romantic". He's decided that this year he's going to do something "really radical". He admits to Kurt that there's a guy he likes, who despite only knowing him a little while, he thinks his feelings are starting to change into something a little deeper. How is he going to reveal this? Through song, of course. It seems obvious that from that speech and the fact that he knows Kurt's coffee order that it might just be he who is the object of Blaine's affections.
At Glee, Schue wants the club to pair up and sing a song to each other especially for Valentine's Day. In other words he wants them to find "the world's greatest love song". Finn takes the opportunity to point out that a whole week has gone by without any of the club getting slushied and says it's all thanks to him leading the football team to victory. He also tells them that he's setting up a kissing booth in order to raise money for the club. "Don't even act like you wanna help Glee club out, you just wanna kiss a bunch of girls," quips Mercedes and Santana is equally scathing. Finn asks her if she ever gets tired of putting other people down. She says she doesn't and that's why everyone loves her. "Actually, you're just a bitch," says Lauren. Ouch.
Hurt by the comments in Glee, Santana is crying into Brittany's arms in the corridor whilst Puck asks Lauren out to Breadsticks for Valentine's. "You seriously think it's that easy? I'm not desperate," she tells him and says that if he wants her he better be prepared to woo her.
Over at Dalton, Blaine has called an emergency meeting for The Warblers council. Blaine tells the
boys that he's in love and that he needs their help to serenade this individual. Kurt's face drops,
when he realises that it isn't him and it's in fact someone who works at Gap. Blaine plans to name
the performance the 'Gap Attack'. Whilst The Warblers may not have performed informally since
1927, they agree that, for Blaine's sake, they'll do it.
At Rachel's house, she, Kurt and Mercedes are having a slumber party to moan about how tragic
their love lives are. Rachel insists that it isn't over for her and Finn and that she's going to go to
his kissing booth with a hundred dollar bill and then he'll be forced to kiss her one hundred times.
Mercedes tries to talk some sense: "the three of us are divas. Look at our idols; Whitney, Barbra,
Patti LuPone. They all became stars while they were single". The three agree to "fly solo" for a while, in order to put their pain and loneliness into their talent.
At Glee it's time for the first of the love songs as Puck performs "Fat Bottomed Girls" by Queen, in
honour of Lauren. I thought you were meant to be wooing her, Puck? Not offending her. Santana
looks rather angry once she realises that there's something going down between the two. When
Pucks asks Lauren's opinion, she tells him, "That's the first time anyone has sung me a love song and it made me feel like crap."
At Finn's kissing booth, all the girls in McKinley are going wild. Quinn corners him and says she knows he's only doing it because she's the only girl in school who won't kiss him. The pair share a flirty exchange but she insists she won't kiss him. Poor Sam catches this and susses that there's something going on between Finn and his girlfriend. Sam goes to the library to confront Quinn about it but she simply brushes it off, saying that Sam is the only boy for her. Yeah, right, Quinn. He says it's odd, though, that she hasn't kissed Finn yet. The two argue before it's agreed after rehearsal she kisses Finn.
